“A breach of integrity stops the flow of energy, just as a pebble jammed in a garden hose stops the flow of water.” ~ Gay Hendricks, psychologist, author, and teacher
What if integrity isn’t about getting everything right? What if it is about noticing what is blocking the flow and removing it?
In the book The Big Leap, Gay Hendricks describes integrity as wholeness and completeness. He offers an image of a pebble jammed into a garden hose. I love this metaphor because a pebble doesn’t have to be big to create a problem. It simply has to be in the wrong place.
The same can be true for us.
Sometimes we can feel that something is off without immediately knowing why. We feel resistance. We feel stuck. We lose some of our energy or enthusiasm. We may even find ourselves pushing harder when what we may need to do is pause and look for the pebble.
This is where inteGRITy comes in.
Integrity is alignment. It is living in a way that reflects our values, our truth, and what matters most to us.
Grit is perseverance. It is the courage and determination to stay engaged and take action when something is difficult, uncomfortable, or uncertain.
Put them together, and inteGRITy becomes a practice:
Notice the pebble, aka obstacle.
Get curious about what is blocking the flow.
Have the grit to remove it.
Maybe the pebble is saying yes when you really mean no. Maybe it is a boundary you haven’t set, a conversation you are avoiding, or a commitment that no longer aligns with what matters to you. Maybe you are simply pushing through when your body is asking you to pause.
These moments aren’t failures. They are information.
The next time you feel that something is off, instead of asking, What’s wrong with me? try asking:
Where is the resistance?
What might be blocking my flow?
What needs my attention?
Sometimes the answer requires a boundary. Sometimes it requires an honest conversation. Sometimes it requires rest. And sometimes it simply requires acknowledging what we already know.
Integrity helps us recognize what is true.
InteGRITy gives us the courage to show up again and again.
Maybe inteGRITy isn’t about never having a pebble in the hose. Maybe it’s about becoming willing to notice when the flow has slowed, find the pebble, and remove it.
Stretching alongside you,
Amy
