“Care deeply about others, but not what they think of you. The former is how you become fulfilled. The latter is how you become free.”~ Joseph Nguyen, author
To care deeply is part of who we are. It’s how we connect with others and make sense of the world around us.
But when we start to measure our worth and accomplishments through other people’s eyes, something shifts. We shape who we are based on how we think we’ll be received. And over time, that can feel exhausting.
Caring what others think pulls us away from our own truth and makes our peace dependent on what others think of us.
And perhaps one of the most vulnerable places this shows up is in our success.
We work, we grow, we stretch into new versions of ourselves, and sometimes the response we hoped for isn’t celebrated by others. Not everyone is happy for us.
It is easy to let others’ reactions define our worth. Doubt creeps in. We shrink. We downplay what we have accomplished.
But your success isn’t meant to be validated externally to be real.
Self-belief is what holds you when the outside world is catty. It’s what says: I know what I am building. I worked hard for this.
Letting go of what others think doesn’t mean you stop caring about people. It means you stop outsourcing your validation based on their response.
Ask yourself: Am I showing up for myself? Am I doing what I need to do? Do I hold myself to my high standard? What is within my control?
That’s where freedom lies.
Freedom to be rooted in yourself. Freedom to trust your own knowing. Freedom to keep going.
So maybe the practice is this:
Care deeply about how you show up for yourself, and gently release the need for validation from those who do not celebrate you. Hold close the ones who do.
Stretching alongside you,
Amy
