“Even when you’re working overtime in an attempt to control how you are being perceived, the other person is still seeing you through the lens of their own world. And by trying to gain control of others’ perceptions, you’re losing something in the process: your sense of self, your precious energy, your peace of mind.”~Meg Josephsoon, LCSW, Are You Mad at Me?
We spend a lot of time and energy trying to manage how other people see us. You might notice this in yourself, replaying conversations, choosing your words carefully, or adjusting how you show up depending on who is in the room. It takes energy, and over time, it pulls you out of connection with yourself.
Where are you working a little too hard to be understood?
Where are you editing yourself to avoid causing waves?
Where are you giving your energy away in an effort to gain approval?
The truth is, no matter what you do, people will see and judge you through their own lens. Their mood, their history, and their expectations all shape how they interpret you. You do not have control over what they think of you.
That can feel uncomfortable. And it can also be freeing.
So try this.
Speak your truth, clearly and simply.
Then stop.
Do not go back to edit.
Do not over-explain.
Do not apologize just to smooth things over or gain approval.
Notice the urge to fix how you were received, and let that urge pass.
This is how you protect your energy and apply it to the people and things that matter most.
Stretching alongside you,
Amy
