“Delegate everything except your genius.” ~ Dan Sullivan
Recently, I signed up for a video creation class at my local community college. Signing up required rearranging my schedule for two evenings and pushing through my discomfort with technology. Once I committed, I was committed.
Then I got the email: the class was canceled due to low enrollment. Argh…
I was bummed. Deflated. Honestly, a little shocked. It took a lot for me to sign up for the class in the first place.
My immediate thought?
“Okay… how am I going to learn this now?”
That one word, “how,” created instant pressure. I pictured hours of YouTube tutorials, trial-and-error frustration, tech confusion, and yet another task added to a full plate.
In the book Who Not How, Dan Sullivan and Benjamin Hardy explain that “How?” often generates overwhelm because it assumes we must personally master every step. It would be easy to blame timing or the class being canceled, but the truth is, I still have no idea how to learn how to create videos.
According to the book, a better question to ask is:
Who can help me achieve this?
Asking a “who” rather than a “how” question opens more possibilities. I thought my goal would be accomplished by taking the class, and now that is no longer an option. Honestly, after I found out the class was canceled, I took a moment to feel my disappointment and to celebrate the part of me that did sign up for the class. That in itself was a major feat and a step in a positive direction toward accomplishing my goal.
Instead of defaulting to frustration, I started thinking more broadly and asked myself:
Is there a former student who loves video editing and can teach me?
Is a colleague already creating content and can show me?
A tech-savvy person who could guide, or even collaborate?
I am learning that when we cling to “How?”, we shrink our goals to fit our current capacity. When we ask “Who?”, we expand our capacity.
In supporting our well-being, this matters. Burnout can disguise itself as independence, trying to do it all ourselves. But sustainable growth requires strategic support.
I don’t yet know exactly how I’ll gain the skills to create videos and edits, as I am still figuring it out. But I am committed to moving forward, and I trust the right “Who” will emerge by my staying open.
This week, notice where you feel stalled.
Where are you stuck in “How?”
Sometimes resilience isn’t about pushing harder or giving up on your dream.
It’s about finding the right people to help you.
Stretching alongside you,
Amy
